It’s Not About Time Outside

Nature connection grows through attention, curiosity, and the simple act of returning.

Last weekend, I noticed two very different experiences unfolding on the NCR Trail near my home.

One person ran by with earbuds in, glancing occasionally at a smartwatch. Nature seemed to provide a beautiful backdrop for exercise.

A few minutes later, I watched a parent kneeling beside a three-year-old who had discovered a butterfly resting on the trail. Together, they watched in complete wonder as it slowly opened and closed its wings.

Both were spending time in nature.

But were they having the same experience?

That question has stayed with me.

As therapists, we often encourage people to spend more time outdoors because decades of research show that nature supports our mental and physical wellbeing. But lately, I’ve begun wondering whether we are asking the wrong question.

Perhaps it isn’t simply, “How much time do you spend in nature?”

Perhaps the better question is, “What kind of relationship do you have with nature?”

We have all experienced the difference in our human relationships. Spending time with someone does not automatically create connection. Yet one meaningful conversation can transform a relationship forever.

Could the same be true of nature?

When I posed this question to a community of Nature-Informed Therapists, their responses were remarkably consistent. They described clients who hike, run, farm, or work outdoors every day, yet experience nature primarily as a place to accomplish something. Others spoke of clients whose healing began during twenty quiet minutes beneath a tree, while watching birds, listening to a stream, or simply learning to notice.

The difference wasn’t time.

It was relationship.

Interestingly, the research is beginning to support this idea. While spending time in nature certainly benefits wellbeing, emerging evidence suggests that nature connectedness, our emotional and experiential relationship with the natural world, may be an even stronger predictor of psychological health than time outdoors alone (Richardson et al., 2021; Hatty et al., 2022). Practices that cultivate curiosity, mindful attention, awe, and reciprocity appear to strengthen both wellbeing and our sense of connection (Richardson et al., 2022).

In other words, it may not simply be how long we spend outside that matters.

It may be how we relate.

I wonder if this is one of the unique contributions Nature-Informed Therapy can make. Rather than simply encouraging people to spend more time outdoors, perhaps our work is to help people develop a meaningful relationship with the more-than-human world.

So here is what I’m practicing.

Most mornings, I take my coffee outside and sit quietly beside the bird feeders. I’ve started recognizing my regular visitors: the cardinal who always seems to arrive first, the curious Carolina Wren, and the noisy downy woodpecker.

But it’s the hummingbird that has captured my heart.

She now hovers just a few feet away, seemingly as curious about me as I am about her. Secretly, I wonder if one day she’ll trust me enough to feed from my hand.

Will that happen?

Maybe.

Maybe not.

But that is no longer the point.

The point is that I’m paying attention. I’m showing up. I’m learning the rhythms of another living being, and perhaps she is learning mine.

Maybe that’s what relationship looks like.

Not extraordinary experiences.

Just two living beings returning, day after day, with enough curiosity to notice one another.

And perhaps that is where both of our healing begins.